L.A. – Secretary

Secretary – L.A.

Aussie: Hello everybody, welcome back to LOLenglish. We are going to do a very special interview with a real live law secretary in a real office. I want you guys to join us right now in Los Angeles, California. Let’s not waste any time. Let’s jump right in.

שלום לכולם, ברוכים הבאים ללול אנגליש. אנחנו הולכים לעשות ראיון מיוחד מאוד עם מזכירה אמיתית במשרד עו”ד אמיתי. אני רוצה שתצטרפו אלינו עכשיו בלוס אנג’לס, קליפורניה. בואו לא לבזבז זמן. בואו לקפוץ ישר פנימה.

Aussie: Hello. My name is Aussie from LOLenglish. How are you today?

Secretary: I’m great. How are you?

Aussie: Very good.  I’m looking for a secretary who wants to be interviewed for our internet site. We are learning English. Are you available Mrs…

Secretary: Well you came to the right place.

Aussie:  Wonderful, Mrs…

Secretary: Mrs. Oved.

Aussie:  Hey, I’m also an Oved.

Secretary:  Nice to meet you Mr. Oved.

Aussie:  Nice to meet you. Very nice. Tell me Mrs. Oved are you working hard or are you hardly working right now?

Secretary: Well let me tell you something.

Aussie: This is LOLenglish everybody where we are supposed to laugh and learn together!

Secretary: I want to tell you I work very hard, but sometimes I’m hardly working.

Aussie:  I believe you!  LOL

Secretary:  I want to tell you something else, I’m the best secretary in this planet! This is my other Mr. Oved and he tells me everyday, “You are the best, so.. “

Aussie:  So tell me Mrs. Oved, what are you doing that you are working so difficult.

Secretary: I’m telling you, we have an amazing case where someone is suing one of our best clients. He’s being sewed for 25 million, with an “m,” dollars with a “d” for something that he didn’t even do.

Aussie:  That’s scary. That’s a big responsibility.

Secretary: He just did some constructional work. And they want to hang him; they want to put him in prison for life for something that he didn’t even do.  This is frustrating. I’m working very hard. It’s not hardly working. It’s working very hard.

Aussie:  Well how much is the house worth?

Secretary: Maybe  a million and a half.

Aussie: And they are suing him for 25 million dollars?

Secretary: Does it may sense?

Aussie: That’s not funny at all.

Secretary: It’s not funny. We are crying every day.

Aussie: So what you’re client is being sued, and you are answering phone calls, and writing and preparing.

Secretary: Yes, I’m writing and I’m typing and I’m sending emails. I like this client ‘cause he’s a nice guy.

Aussie: Honest and nice. Nice and honest.

Secretary: We will do everything to help him.

Aussie: Tell me something Mrs. Oved, can I call you Mrs. Oved?

Secretary:  No, you can call me Mom.

Aussie: Oh, okay, that makes sense, Mrs. Mom, tell me something Mrs. Mom, we want to learn a little bit about what a secretary has in her office. What are some office supplies. Maybe you can take us on a small tour.

Secretary: As you can see, a lot of papers, cookies, munchies. This is like, I need my energy when I put so much effort and work, so this is what I’m doing all day, “menashneshet.”

Aussie: Aaaah, minashneshet, I see you speak Hebrew. We are teaching Hebrew for Israelis. But we want to know the office supplies Mrs. Oved, oh, I’m sorry, Mrs. Mom.

Secretart:  Pencils and a stapler. We have a calculator.

Aussie: We have a drawer. What’s in the drawer?

Secretary: We have everything. We have whiteout, glue…

Aussie: That’s very fast. We have glue. This is whiteout – we want the white out!

Secretary: Oh, I have nail polish; my boss doesn’t know about it.  Shhhhh..

Aussie:   Shhhhhh.

Secretary: We have envelopes. Billions of envelopes.  And paper clips like this kind.

Aussie:  Wait, what is this?

Secretary: Oh, stamps. When we mail something we have to take the stamp and stick it on an envelope.

Aussie:  And we have a computer here, I see.

Secretary: Yes, we have a computer. This is my window to the rest of the world.

Aussie: What is this?

Secretary:  This is a mouse, עכבר.

Aussie: Like Mickey Mouse, but a computer mouse. And this a keyboard, and this is a computer screen.  That is very interesting, very very interesting.

Secretary: Very interesting.

Aussie: What else is very interesting here? Oh we have books.

Secretary:  We have law books, real estate books.  Oh my Gosh the telephone.

Aussie:  A real, live telephone.

Secretary: This is a real live… Good afternoon, law offices.  Hello. Is anybody there? Hello? Oh, it’s for you. Hold on, hold on.  

Aussie: Hello. Aussie, LOLenglish.  Aha, yes. I understand. Okay that’s easy, we are learning present progressive – what is happening right now. We use the verb “to be (am, is, are) and the verb in the “ing” form.   Aha, great. What? Who is this? Who is speaking? What are you doing now? Where are you going? You want to what, you want to take me out for lunch? WOW, that’s very special. Wait, I’m sorry, I’m having a lunch date with Mrs. Mom at 1 p.m.. Really? WOW!  He’s inviting you too.

Secretary: Yeah. Let’s go! Is he paying?

Aussie: Are you paying also for her too?  Absolutely.

Secretary: Let’s wrap it.

Aussie:  Let’s wrap it up. Okay we are going to the falafel on Ventura Blvd. (boulevard). We are going to drive to the falafel on Ventura Blvd.  Thank you very, very much. That was very nice of you. Okay we’ll see you later. Bye bye.

Aussie:  Okay everybody, thank very much for joining us on LOLenglish. Thank you Mrs. Mom for having us.  That’s a beautiful hat by the way, I must say.

Secretary:  Thank you. Mr. Oved brought it straight from Israel.

Aussie: That’s beautiful. Okay everybody. Have a good time. We’ll see you in Israel.